Branding Matters

How Hitting Rock Bottom Changes Your Purpose with Bob Marier (The Sober Coach)

April 30, 2021 Branding Badass Season 1 Episode 22
Branding Matters
How Hitting Rock Bottom Changes Your Purpose with Bob Marier (The Sober Coach)
Show Notes Transcript

Today I’m sitting down with a blast from my past – literally! His name is Bob Marier and he is the Principal and Founder of Hired Sobriety - a leading personal recovery services group that offers professional support to addicts and their families.

After more than 17 years in long term recovery from alcohol and substance abuse, today Bob is internationally known as the Celebrity Sober Coach. His clients include everyone from professional athletes to public figures, most notably the former mayor of Toronto Canada, the late Rob Ford.

I invited Bob to be a guest on my show to learn about his incredible journey. I wanted to know what’s behind his bold branding and how a guy from Montreal became one of the world’s most sought after interventionists with more than 400,000 followers on Instagram.

Thanks for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5-star rating along with a brief review.

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Hey there, I'm Joelly - the Branding Badass. My badass superpower is helping you build a brand that matters. From branded merch to brand consulting, when you work with me, you get results!

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Joelly Goodson Lang:

Hi, I'm Joelly, your Branding Badass, and welcome to my new podcast. Branding Matters. Today I'm sitting down with a blast from my past. Literally, his name is Bob Marier and he is the principal and founder of hired sobriety, a leading personal recovery services group that offers professional support to addicts and their families after more than 17 years in long term recovery from alcohol and substance abuse. Today, Bob is internationally known as a celebrity sober coach. His clients include everyone from professional athletes to public figures, most notably the former mayor of Toronto, Canada, the late Rob Ford, I invited Bob to be a guest on my show to learn about his incredible journey. And I am telling you, it is incredible. I also wanted to know what is behind his bowl branding, and how a guy from Montreal became one of the world's most sought after interventionists with more than 400,000 followers on Instagram. When it comes to my interviews, it does not get any more raw than this. You're gonna laugh, you're gonna cry. And I hope you're gonna learn a few things along the way, not only about Bob, but about what it takes to be a real branding. badass. Bob, welcome to branding matters.

Bob Marier:

Thank you for having me at branding matters.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

Well, it's really great having you here.

Bob Marier:

You've known me for 35 years. So it's not like we knew each other when we were teenagers.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

Yes, we have known each other a long, long, long time, I'm gonna actually give the Reader's Digest version because I think it is a really cool story. So I think we I think we actually first met back in Montreal, when I was working at case a ra, right, one of our favorite high notes, my work there in the summers when I was going to university and you were there pretty regularly. And it was a lot of fun working there anyway. And so that's how I think we met and then, you know, life took us in different directions, right? I mean, we literally I literally think the last time I saw you was when I was probably the last summer I worked there. So then we went our separate ways went on with our lives. I went traveling moved out west, you I guess stayed in Montreal moved around, and then as a blue, I get this requests on, I think it was Instagram about a year, maybe two and and I sort of took me a second. I was like, Bob, Marissa, that name sounds familiar. And you know, I had to go back 20 something 30 years, and then I was like, Oh my God. And then we connected. And I think we had a little chat back and forth. And then we just sort of stayed connected via social media. And then when I decided to do this podcast, I became more aware, especially social media and people that were on there and people that I knew and started following people and I started checking out your Instagram posts. And then all of a sudden, I had no idea what you did remember you because you said you know what I do. I remember you were like you don't even know what I do. And then I started following you. And I loved your posts. I mean, again, my wheelhouse is branding. So I loved your branding. It was all very bold and honest. And just so fantastic. And so when I decided to this podcast, and you and I were talking, I think you actually messaged me about a post I did or something. And then I called you right away. And I was like, hey, I want to ask you something, you know, and I said you want to be on my podcast. Anyway, I think it took us a little bit of back and forth and scheduling because you are a busy guy. But I'm so I'm so glad that we finally made it happen. And here we are today. I want to know sort of where you from when we left off to January 3, can you give a real synopsis of all those years in a nutshell?

Unknown:

The date, which is like I don't even think my own brothers or sisters know it but you know, my sobriety date is January 3. So prior to me getting into recovery, I wasn't a very consistent person, either in my moods or in my work or in my anything. I always had a job and I always had a work coming in. But I didn't have a clue. I thought if I didn't drink out of a paper bag or live in a van down by the river that precluded me from being an alcoholic or a drug. And because there was always cash in the bank and gas in the tank as it were, I never thought I used to use that line will work hard or play hard. But in the time that you haven't seen me in those times, I had, you know cemented myself when you say we met at that bar. I used to sleep at that bar in a hammock in the office you know and well it was funny Oh Bob's here all the time. He lives here literally I realized that at a young age probably my 15 or 16 that I identified with this hard drinking hard using type of person and I thought that that was the person I want to be goes to projecting an image that you believe you want to be and then I think a lot of people are guilty guilty of this they This is the person I want to be you know, you say this is you know, that's it and that was not my genuine self. I didn't have a clue my genuine self was and impact To every type of addiction is progressive, and I didn't know any of that, but believe me, I was progressing and progressing at a large matter. Like, it just got worse and worse.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

And everybody was doing it just backing up to Chris case raw. I mean, I was, you know, I was waitressing there and everybody was doing everybody was out, you know, back then, Wednesday nights to Sunday night, the bartender sold drugs. You know, they were I know, I was actually it's funny. I a lot of people thought that I did cocaine when I worked there, because I think most people did. And I never did. And if I did, I would do. I know. And I would admit it if I did, because I'm very open and very transparent. And I remember talking to people about that. And it was sort of known for that. I mean, case was not around anymore. So I don't feel like I'm bad mouthing them. But it was known for that, right? A lot of people that weren't there. And so it was just part of the whole environment. You know,

Unknown:

I did my first line of code, get 5138 a month away from my 39th birthday. And as I talk about progression, like, you know, people say, well, you're a sobriety coach. Okay, well, does that do in order to be a sobriety coach, especially since I came into the year that didn't matter? And I got like, it's interesting. You say, Well, Brandon, I knew nothing about grit. But like I said, I'll just tell you my store and then we'll go into the branding. Yeah, yeah,yeah. I come into recovery. by necessity. I am January 2 2004. I don't go into details. I ended up in the hospital as an accident directly related to my drug use. between the lines that party and started in New York City on December 30, ended in Los Angeles on January 2, that was just normal behavior. For me. I had money and I had means and I was living in LA, I was working on La at Paramount Studios, as a line producer, literally and figuratively.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

Known as like the guy that people would go to to get their fix?

Bob Marier:

like, well, that would be I wasn't a dealer. I was kind of the middleman. I was the party guy. We got to get in care. We need to get this. I'm still the guy. It's kind of funny. Like people go just call Bob. He's got a guy that does everything. Right? Different but the same. Yeah. When I couldn't run away from as I'd say, at 15, that's when clinical depression started to set in with me. I couldn't identify I didn't know. But I really worked hard on driving that narrative that I was this guy, the guy that, you know, the guy was trying to beat was killing myself and I was emotionally stunted. You don't know this, when you're doing that. When most people say when you when an addiction gets hold of you is when you stop maturing, especially emotional. So I was 15. When I came in here, 38 years. That makes me about 25. The reality of the sadness that I lived with for years, and I could never add in want to talk about it. Mental Health wasn't something we spoke about the 80s and 90s, certainly not. But I can tell them that I never felt really part of I had friends that were good friends, I had some people that were more a lot more messed up than me. But I was still there. And I had a lot of people telling me along the way, man, if you could ever harness the power you have or the the energy you have, you can't miss, you know, Paul Massey, who you work for it this really case are all like, is a dear friend of mine, he's my age, he just turned 56. I'm a month and two days older than him. But he said to me when especially when I first came into recovery, so I hope you can do this because to you, there'll be no stopping. And I remember thinking it meant a lot to me coming from an industry trend in the corners. They're good friends of mine. These are gentlemen that were successful in the bar business, but I think they can see that there might have been something more in me that I never saw myself. And I never saw it because when you have low self esteem and your self centered, those are the accoutrements of any good addict. You don't want to hear anyone talking about anything that looks like your problem. And anyone that mentions anything that resembles the truth, well, they need to be amputated from your life. So away I went. And then coming into, you know, January 2 2004, I had an overdose. So I culminating in you know, I'm in the hospital, I wake up and my first words that could happen, anyone instead of my normal person would say, Okay, this needs to stop. This has to be the biggest warning shot. And there were many warning shots. There were many things that under normal highway of life, a normal person would say, okay, that's a bit too spicy for my liking what's going on here, it was crazy, where I found myself, I shouldn't have been in these places. But that's where brought me to, because when you have low self esteem and your self centered, you care more about what it looks like and what it feels like. That's the first thing, which is a big problem. I think a lot of people are guilty of ever I live with, you know, low to high grade depression for 23 years, and I went to doctors and you know, when they give you anti antidepressants, I was diagnosed with bipolar, not even remotely bipolar. It's not hard to be bipolar when you're emotionally disregulated a guy was, but you would be too if you drank a liter of vodka every three days or every two days. And you were using all kinds of other drugs to get it and so I used everything except marijuana. kind of crazy. Never food never tasted. It did to me know where I want to go. But were my Emotional dysregulation, and then on happiness. I have 20 years of family pictures. I'm a big family. But we had big Christmases and we could sell admission for these things. And I have two wonderful parents. They're both passed. Now, that got to see those son fixes, oh, avert death and thrive in. It started very humbly it started without any fanfare, I got thrown out of rehab on day 42. Because I wouldn't take a job at what was then Jabba you in Montreal, like a little local coffee shop, and I said, I've done everything that's asked of me here. And they use the word you have to get humility gentleman, I said my brains hadn't fallen out of my head. I still had money. It was cash in the bank. I wasn't working. I had a very good insurance policy that was paying me to be treatment. And away I went, it was March 18 2004. But it was that Sunday was when we had the St. Patty's Day parade and they threw me out. Like they were like in this rehab. And I was like, Oh, he's gonna fail now. And now it's this accident. It happened to me in California, and I didn't transported back to material detox in California came to rehab in Montreal, and I was so hell bent on thing. It was the first time I was so motivated, how the fuck that I get my life into this, like, I'm in a rehab with crazy people. Wait, I'm a crazy person, you can see where we messed up and started to take that look inwards. So what needs to be done, the moment I stopped using, my brain started to get better. And in 30 days, ostensibly, your brain is at 99%. If you haven't damaged alcohol, permanently, I hadn't damaged it permanently, or some ice I have. But I knew that if I continued down this path that I was going to have to face some hard truths. Like I say that again. I'm full of faults, and never address the worst one being the sadness. And I had childhood trauma happened to me, and I buried it. I buried it like it never happened. And that's growing inside me.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

I just want to stop you there for one second. We know each other well enough where I can interrupt you like, no, but you said something that actually I wanted to ask you about I heard you say once that trauma is the gateway to addiction. And I thought that was a really powerful statement. And so you just touched on that I'd like you to can you elaborate a bit more about that

Unknown:

thought that believe that addiction? There's like the American Medical Association in 1956 said it's a complicated biochemical problem I'm born so the genetic piece so people are saying Well, that's great, that genetic piece well look in your family, ask your mom and your dad to look down your family tree three generations and see if like, crazy Uncle Bill who died at 43 died of depression or he hanged himself because he fucking hated himself but we didn't deal with stuff in the 50s and 60s or even further back or drank heavily alcohol disorder or alcohol abuse disorder they did they you know, he was an alcohol again, he died because he got cirrhosis of the liver but they sent his liver failed when he failed because of so when we can look back that's called a junior gram. That's social workers use but I started look like my dad and two brothers that died in the bar. And my mom who was adopted and we didn't know what had gone on with her. We found out after she passed that there was a whole lowered story after only after she passed and like again, a lot of it came from that. But my mom and dad were not affected in any way shape, or form. They were normal people so it can skip to

Joelly Goodson Lang:

whatever normal means quotation.

Unknown:

They were I never heard my mom and dad raised voices each other in my life. six kids,

Joelly Goodson Lang:

I never can't say the same thing.

Unknown:

They loved each other as of the day that's crazy, but that was my normal. I grew up in a home that was spotless, you know, it was it was always well kept. lawn was well, that's how I grew up. And was that was normal to us. We were crazy. All kids were all nuts. But my parents saw the where I talk about trauma is that even with that stuff that like the gateway drug, they say, oh, marijuana is again great. No, it was it was trauma. So if you have a kid that automatically feels worse speak be it from and there's high impact trauma and drip drip trauma. drip drip trauma is like your young girl and your mother says you know you can look fat it's a passive thing. It can be Oh, you know what, you're never gonna be good enough to try that well that over the years spills this bucket and then it and then I can say well fuck it I'm gonna start to drink to forget feeling less than and then there's high impact death in the family. A death of a sibling the death of a parent young age, high impact or molestation? Yeah, bad accident or abuse in any like, all of those things can be what just called the high impact thing. I went for years to different doctors and different therapists in varying degrees, they would give me SSRIs which net depressants and I drank on these and use cocaine was my drug of choice. And I wondered why they didn't work, you know, and then every now and then I'd flush into an emergency room where you get treated like garbage because they just think an addict made a choice. I didn't choose to drink and use this way.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

I think that's the biggest thing is you hear people all the time when they talk about addicts or when they refer to either it's an alcoholic or drug addict. They're referred to in a really negative term. Right. They say like, Oh, yeah, I know that guy. He's a drug addict or I know that guy. He's, oh, he's, yeah, no, but I've heard I've heard you know, that's just the natural go to and the reality is, and I don't know if I heard you in an interview or something you talked about where it's like, if you take a second to ask why chances are there's probably a story there have the reason for that. And the illness, it's an illness, right?

Unknown:

Yeah. It's an illness. It's a medical American Medical Association. Yeah. One of my ex sister in laws once said to me, that was a choice. And that was a pretty big,

Joelly Goodson Lang:

yeah,

Bob Marier:

yeah. Yeah. Same choices if you got cancer to choose this. Exactly.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

And you know, and it's the same thing. Yeah. And same thing with mental illness, right. I mean, I have people in my life who suffer from varying forms of mental illness. You mentioned bipolar and depression. And same thing is like, it's not a choice. You know, I wanted to bring you on here. Well, I obviously want to get to the whole branding aspect, but also to talk about this kind of stuff, because I love just educating people. That's a big part of this. So before we get into your branding, so how did you go from that day, January 3, to becoming a sobriety coach,

Unknown:

I was really good at live events and stuff. When I got sober. I moved to Miami, and we went to a sober living, sober living is a home you live in with other men that are restarting their lives, and it's a safe place and you have to urine test every day. And you have to get a job. I had Meals on Wheels in like Miami Beach, which people food you're gonna have to use. You have to have a job, sir. And you didn't have my work visa was allowed me to work in production. No, it had nothing to do with me being sober. So they had me working. And it was interesting, because I went to the heart of the party. I live in South Beach is where I'm at today, in my little apartment in Miami. It started with that when I came into recovery. That was it. And I took 10 months off. So this happened in January. I went back to work in October. And then October when I went back to work I did four days back on lot to paramount. And I work for a man that was able to put me back on my insurance. He doesn't want me saying is the police responsible for Seinfeld. He's a pretty important guy. He said to me, can you work here, I said, I won't be able to stay sober. If I stay here. And he sent me back. He had me go back to the psychiatrist. And he revealed things to me like his brother had died in addiction. And he didn't want that to happen to me. And he said, you go to the psychiatrists and tell them we still have time and I was able to buy myself time i was i was able to get paid while I was on sick leave. And I came back into it. And then I started doing live events like experiential marketing for different companies doing these events. My first big event was like Mexico beyond your expectations in 2004. In the winter, they have these live beaches, portable beaches, and they were doing them in throughout Canada and produced the events and I worked for a big company in the states and I was able to produce the Canadian events and do them it was a great gig did these live events and then I went into marketing. I went into that as I was the salesperson and I went out and did it and we did brand is a company called money sex love. It was a branding company in Canada. My was now my ex wife. She's a five star creative she is at wonderment, Tom, a wonderment Thompson now It used to be J. Walter Thompson. But now it's wunderman Thompson, and she's a creative director, a high level, you know, limit hat and the whole thing. I was working with her doing sales, and we were doing convergent marketing, we started doing stuff. And it was really on the cusp in 2006. We started doing a lot of hotels, and a lot of really, you know, how their messaging was done right down to what does that paper feel like when you touch it? You know, how does that work? Yeah,

Joelly Goodson Lang:

experiential. Yeah,

Unknown:

very, very much. And I specialized in that. And I did that for about 40 years. And in that period of time, now I'm five years sober, but I started helping others. And it became, it was very natural to me, we would watch the TV show intervention on Sunday nights. And she'd say, You're, you're more dynamic, those people, you got more. And I was like, yeah, and she would laugh because we'd be working. And she said up cottage industries calling because there's so many people calling me all the time, all the hours of the night, and I'd get dressed and I got to go help this person or this person is at a bar drunk, I gotta go get them. And that was what I was doing. And it really didn't seem like I was an interventionist or doing anything like that. But I'd watched that show. And I say, Yeah, I wonder if I could do that. So in 2010, she paid for me to go to Los Angeles and do a training. And I did the training. And when I did this training, the man that ran the training set to me, there was 22 people, and he said, You could do this for a living. And that's really nice. He said, you probably say that all the girls, he said, I've been training for 25 years, I've never told a single person that's done my course.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

Wow. So what was the course?

Bob Marier:

It was like training Vernon Johnson intervention is the model of intervention, okay, so as to be to learn how to be a proper intervention. Exactly. And you thought a lot the certification you get is good. These are good things to learn and the safety protocols and stuff like that, but it started there rather humbling. And I started to do it. I said, I came home and I said, Okay, not going to work anymore. I'm going to do this. I had some savings. And I quickly went about building this thing. This brand, if you will, and I didn't have a website then I didn't have anything I didn't even have a name for the company. Nothing is just give me Bob Mary interventions. That was it. And we're going to work with that. And as I started the carpet out, the first year was tough. And I went looking for business in all the wrong places. I do a job one night, and I go up the hill on westmount and Montreal, and I get my ass handed to me by us, almost 70 year old woman that had me do an intervention on her son. And it was her son's like, it was two of them. And she handed me she had worked in the 50s as a psych nurse, and she basically question everything I did. And I came home. And I remember like, I was deflated. I was like, What an idiot. I thought I could do this, this and that. And it was the first time like, my ex really said, like, this isn't you you never met a fight. You didn't want to get into getting a fucking car, go up there and tell your fucking name and like she's like, go up there. You need to do this because I thought I'd blown $100,000 I was magical thinking on my part, I think I could be somebody that I couldn't. I have no education, and other than my high school degree and I went to many universities and got thrown out and I went back because we were locked in. I was like, even went to the I drove back up there and said, I need to speak to you again. And I went in there. And it was like, I just turned the corner the switch turned on. I said lady, but no offense, but I've forgotten more than you'll ever know about addiction. And I just turned on, it was a bit ballsy. And I did it and he's sober today. This kid that was the beginning where I went, yeah, I got some swagger now nearly nearly all went by the wayside. And Now let's check out Rob Ford is the biggest thing on the news ever. There was crack stories is all the stories of bad behavior and stuff, Bob sorry,

Joelly Goodson Lang:

because this podcast, believe it or not, is international for people who have no idea Rob Ford was the mayor of Toronto, one of Canada's biggest cities, and he was

Unknown:

his biggest city, the fourth biggest city in North America. Yes, thank

Joelly Goodson Lang:

you. And he was a coke addict, or why don't you describe a little bit of who he was and what was his addiction?

Unknown:

I would tell you that he was a man who had an addiction issue. It was very popular. Now, it's important to also realize he was the most googled politician in 2014. That's crazy. It's crazy before Trump. And he was, you know, he had a lot of Chris Farley. And and people always said he reminded me of Chris Farley. And then the weirdest truth is stranger than fiction. I had been the year before in 2013. I went to a hockey game, the Canadians were playing the Leafs and I went to harbor 60 Steakhouse. I sat next to him at a table and introduce myself. He was having dinner. Oh, no way. And I took a picture with him. Yeah, it was kind of funny. He was like, here we are. We're there for it. Went to the hockey game had a good night, Canadians one Fast Forward six months, it's may of 2014. And I got a call saying Would you be interested in in auditioning, if you will. We were going through a process. And I said, Yeah, and I had multiple phone calls by from lawyers to a whole bunch of different people called me. And I think the rehab was really a catalyst on getting that. But they brought in a whole bunch of people when we did on June 18 2014, that drove up to the rehab. And I'm in there with guys with, you know, master's degrees and who brought you in who was additionally or who was injured? Was that like part of his team? But it was like, it was an exhausting, like, I must have had 10 phone calls. I was like, Yeah, whatever. And at this point, you're like, you're a long shot. Yeah, you'll find it all down. I leave Montreal I drive up there on the 18th of which was then my wedding anniversary. I remember the date. But I I drove down there. And when I come to the place, I mean, like this is strange. We're all in the room at the same time. All the other guys that are petitioning for this Oh, one of the guys there always says it because I said Well, you're all screwed. And then we'll get a job here today. So you guys don't. One of the guys told me afterwards like he's in their meeting. And he's like thinking, fuck is this guy? How could he come into that room and say that to us? That's me playing Bob. That's me playing Mike North Shore football kidding me? That was very competitive. Wow. Yeah. When I went in there to meet him, he was not in good shape. He was in pretty rough shape or gotten treatment still using I guess he was he was still a knee brace, top coffee, or you didn't look like he was all there. And I was furious. I said, I just drove like five and a half hours in Muskoka with your six and a half hours in Montreal. You're sitting and you're in this shape. Like, fuck, dude, what the fuck is going on? I was furious. And I went on a diatribe. I was like, I got nothing to lose here. And all those interviews before me like there was three guys who went before me it was smack in the middle. And I stayed with him for two hours. I was in a long conversation with him. We walked the grounds. We ate lunch, just the two of you, just the two of us. And he said you're the only person that didn't ask me about like, what my childhood was like so and he goes Do you do too busy yelling at me? I was like, Yeah, well, I said you can leave here if you think you're being laughed at now shits gonna happen when you leave. Anyway, I drove out of there. And again, my ex wife calls and she said how to go on us. The joke was I came from two barrels of Bob. And she got when she said she got the job. I said, My next job, we'll see what happens. And an hour later, the phone rang and they said, we've chosen you. You need to be back here to pick them up on June 30. I said, Okay, no problem. I'll be back on June 30. June 30 comes it's big news that gets national news. It's all over the newspapers, that he's in treatment, and he's leaving. And I get called out like, fly. I'm dragging my feet. Like, I know, I have to leave Montreal. I gotta fly to Toronto. He's north of Toronto and Muskoka. And I'm being told like, Yeah, I got to go in that day. I was really slow on. I remember, she said, like, What's the matter? Why don't your bag pack? Like, why aren't you ready to go and I'm just going what we call in country and going to work for a period of time. ordinare like, all of my employees, two week maximum, I'm going to rotate you out. They used to put you in for a month, five weeks, no problem. I was going in like, Okay, I'm going from it. And I went, and once I get landed there, in Toronto, the next morning, I wake up, it's July 1, I got woken up, I'm staying across the street from City Hall. And a policeman is at the door at 6am. And they're asking me all these questions about what I do and stuff. He didn't know. It was the police chief checking out who the hell I was. And I went up to go get Muskoka. And it was like the oj car chase. They were following helicopters. It was insane. Wow. And we got out and I've never seen anyone take it on the chin like that. resign, you fat fuck, you're an addict?

Joelly Goodson Lang:

Yeah. It was all I mean, he was also you know, chemo leaves on Yeah, you're right. He was the front of the joke. And everybody was talking. He was a very sweet guy. And I had a really good I had a good relationship with him. Wasn't there an incident that happened that catapulted you into the limelight?

Unknown:

Yeah. So the first week I'm there, only the staff knows I'm a sobriety coach. I'm there. They're keeping me under wraps. We go to 1010 News. The day before this internet and my brother's radio disc jockey Mike Ben Dixon is the program director of 1010 News at the time, and he had worked at cjd, and he goes Jesus Christ, it's Bob Marriott. So, you know, I'm in the middle of doing my job here. I'd appreciate it keep in fact, he was on Twitter a minute after he saw me, I know who it is. And that story started to roll and my mom is still alive. My mom's phone rang over 100 times that day, because

Joelly Goodson Lang:

they saw you in the news. Is that why?

Unknown:

Oh, no, that was like, now we know his name. The next day, we're at an event and these paid protesters are yelling at us that they have no shirts on these big guys. And Rob was up there. And I was doing his best to do and I was amazed at this man's like, I could not have spoken in that thing. When he just went through it. I'm saying my speech and that's it yelling screaming and whispering new transit stop somewhere on undone this. And I remember thinking to myself, geez, this guy's got to stop yelling. And it was like my guy was yelling at I got mad, but I didn't kick them. They blame me for that. Even the policeman said, he's sorry, may God strike me dead from everyone above. I never kicked this guy that I figured, well, that's the end of my job. Like cop was accusing me. Rob gets off. We get back in the car and he's laughing. He says, You stick up for me. It's like really happy. He said, I saw you. It says my killer. So what did you do? You didn't kick the guy reached around in front of with my leg and like, saddle I went in front of him, you know, trying to push them back? Like, okay, and the police said that? touch him? Yeah. No, I walked away. And he said, you'll be in the new cycle for 18 to 24 hours, and then we'll move on. That'll be I said, Really? He said, yeah. And he said, you're going to stick with me. And that's it. We're not going to talk about this. Alright, and then the next morning, I woke up. And he has, he's the mayor. So all the newspapers, and I'm picking up, I'm at his home. And he says, Look at all the newspaper, you're on the front page. And like across Canada, I was like, Oh my God. And then the media requests are the command higher sobriety does not have a website at this time. So enter my ex who is more than aplomb. But getting this together and put hired sobriety together named how we were going to build this is a brand new book, which is still being articulated today.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

So that notoriety ended up catapulting you in.

Bob Marier:

And immediately I was in the top of the best in the world.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

Overnight, right? And then people start

Unknown:

and we are scared to go on the 30th. So this cannot be the footnote. This guy can last five minutes after he leaves there like this really, I'm going to drink is not a fucking thing. You can do your sobriety coach, you say well, I wouldn't recommend that you can't do that. The moment that client is the point to the point where he's not listening to you you've lost your effectiveness. Your job is to leave. Right and I was like but I would have been the footnote on fuck what a maroon Bob member he thought he could do this. So there was a lot there. There was a lot of in my mind, how am I going to do this and I'm I'm not going I'm defending a brand I'm defending my name. I could have gone either way. And it went the right way. But it immediately put me and my phone started ringing immediately

Joelly Goodson Lang:

so it changed your life

Unknown:

I would you say yeah, absolutely changed my life on this business. Yeah, you know, I when people ask me how come you have a 400,000 followers on Instagram? Well, I was gonna get to that I have now left the company I work for and I Okay, while I'm doing this job I come home after 44 days off and we press live, we're going tired sobriety exists. And the first iteration of that really slick pictures of me it looks good. It's very well put together and it is really it's beautifully done conceptually, visually, but I know what brand matters. I knew that it needed to look good smell good or work that I did not know the level of what I got until it was delivered to me and and I was proud of it. The moment I saw it, it catapulted me on to this and then fast forward to I now have the brand they keep me away from cameras, but I'm working. I'm constantly learning constantly contact and we're doing our job. But at that point, my phone is ringing. We got to get the guy to brought forward from all four corners of North America is ringing. And I've trained most everyone that works for me myself. They've worked for me that notice like apparently, you don't use the word awesome. When you work for Bob Maryann, you don't use any type of platitudes.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

So I want to know why?

Bob Marier:

you know, the Grand Canyon. Yeah, that's awesome. That's awesome. Yeah, okay, is TimHortons. Awesome?

Unknown:

No, that isn't. So. People from Ontario use it a lot more than anywhere else. I find it amazing. But I don't use that. And it's like, everyone that knows me. pisses off.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

I think it's a good point. You're absolutely right. When anything is overused, then it loses its meaning and doesn't have the same

Unknown:

word crutches. I don't know why in my head when someone uses a couple of platitudes. Yeah, you're getting off with me. Yeah. No, and I'm immediate, like, stop them start

Joelly Goodson Lang:

you. I like that. You called me on it, actually.

Unknown:

Can I be honest with you? I say. So that predicates that everything else is a fucking lie you're telling.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

Yeah, I know. I know. I know. But I love that you called me on that because it's true. This episode of branding matters is brought to you by gems for gems. gems for gems is a proactive charity focused on ending the cycle of domestic abuse. They do this by creating viable and sustainable path forward for survivors with a concentration on empowerment and economic recovery. gems for gems works hand in hand with the community to help survivors thrive. What can you do to help? Well, if you have any use jewelry lying around that you no longer wear, and let's be honest, we all have some of that you can donate it to their jewelry drive. If you have any spare time, and you want to find a way to give back, this is a great opportunity, and you can join their ambassador program. I personally am a part of this ambassador program, because I'm all about empowering women. And this is a great opportunity to do just that. And then finally, if you'd like to contribute financially, you can become a donor to their incredible scholarship program, whichever way you decide to help, just know that you are making a huge difference. And your contribution is meaningful and greatly appreciated. To learn more about gems for gems, you can visit their website at gems for gems.com. You can also find them on Facebook, under gems, for gems, and on Instagram, under gems for gems Canada, and you can always reach out to me on any social media platform under branding badass. And now back to our show. So I want to go back to your Instagram account. So you have over 400,000 followers. And you're like I said to you originally when I wanted to have you on, it's because I was really impressed with your account and really impressed with your branding. And the reason why is because it's not only as a very professional, and it's eye catching, and everything else, but you connect with your audience. And that is a huge thing about branding. You know, and I talk a lot about that about being authentic, and about connection. And you do those two things. So Well, I mean, you can see you, you share your vulnerability, which is also hugely important when people can be vulnerable. That's a great way to connect with your audience. And you do that in a really bold, creative, authentic way. And so those are three things in my mind that makes your branding stand out. So with your 400 followers,

Unknown:

400,000 sorry, 400,000 followers, you've created this tribe, right like your your it is, but it's gonna be interesting what I tell you, I had it working more than that. I have a girl that talks my language, I come up with some of the things or I find some of the things and we build them through the brand. And the iteration started from the first brand book to where we're at today. But in COVID I don't think I did five posts in 2020 of my notoriety comes from there was a documentary done on my life with the vice vice did this documentary about the Iraq war that's been played in. I think it's in Chinese in every language like it's in the Arab world. I'm working in the Arab world regularly from the Emirates to Saudi Arabia and stuff because they started to see who's this and I'm part swashbuckler, there's no doubt about that video has been seen by Vice I think 18 million times. So that's going to get you notoriety. I have some famous clients as Some famous people that I don't piggyback on it, but you know, they add my name. So that was it. But the two sided sword here is, you're going to get those followers every time I turned my phone on, there's 100 DMS, I can't answer all those, I have to pay someone to go look at them and say like triage some of these things, you know, I try and use it consciously, you know, how many people call me and say, let's call up I own a rehab let's you advertise for my opinion, like, No, no, no, no, like, some big company called me like you're selling beds, and you want me to, because I talked about beds on some podcast, and they're like, Oh, we don't need to be yours. No, I won't use it for that. I won't monetize it in any way, shape, or form, I guess when you'll know when I start to sell out is when I start to use it to monetize stuff. And it is shocking how many people Let's call out buy sell men's bathing suits, or I sell and I didn't, I'm not interested in doing any of that, again, a lot of really sad people looking for help looking for a resort. And obviously, it can't be all things to all people. And I don't want to leave anyone on the side of the road. So we have to be and like, I'll get calls and they're like, Okay, well, you need to call this one. And I'll call and they'll be excited to talk to me. But I'm like, okay, matter of factly you're in Maryland, here's some resources that I'm able to find, you know, because I looked them up and out, send them to him like public resources. Here's the secret that I could tell you, you asked me for helping you to give it to you,

Joelly Goodson Lang:

I get the impression it's more than just a job to you in the sense that you're obviously very passionate about it, you know, you're you've turned your life around. And I mean, there's,

Unknown:

there's like, I'm not that bright, and it's paying it forward. So much. And it's so much it was so much better than than it was for most of my life. And knowing that the cost of admission was delivered absent lifestyle. But from that absent lifestyle came the gifts, the gifts of being able to be president like, my mom and dad both passed. On the day I buried my dad, which would be the worst day of my life was horrible was bad. It was the day that he would have been most proud of me. He was my fucking emotional look at my baby. Look at him. Look at how he behaved today. for the whole family. Nobody was looking. He just he showed up and he did his thing. That meant big. I remember coming home and going I miss him terribly. I'd miss him every day. But I remember thinking, yeah, he will. You know, my dad was born in 1925. They didn't put their arm around me and call me son. He didn't know that you love me off. But I'm like, emotional thinking of it. And my mom got 14 years of me after I'd unfuck myself and got to see me be a proper son. I traveled everywhere with her. I did all these things. She got sick in Florida here a few years ago, she she knew she was sick. And my mom was the healthiest looking sick person. She had advanced heart disease at six years old. But she knew that I gotta go home, don't feel good. And then she was gone within the month. And it was one night where they couldn't give her anything to church. She had a kidney failure, she had all kinds of things happening to her body was shutting down. And she was delirious and my sister is going to cry. That I've never been more proud of you watching you and mom. I was like, yeah, you make me cry. And

Joelly Goodson Lang:

you're gonna make me cry.

Unknown:

My sister said, like, you're so fucking good at this. And you were in you, God, she just listening to you. She was in the worst place on earth and you hide you're feeling safe. And that's the like, I think I was born to this job,

Joelly Goodson Lang:

of course, based on all the information that you shared. And there's so much and it's all valuable. If you could go back to when you were 15 years old, knowing what you had to go through all those years and knowing where you are today. Would you do anything different? Or would you do the same way?

Unknown:

I would do everything the same way. The journey God is sound like a fucking infomercial. But the journey has been like I've learned a grown through the process of that then when your expertise is your experience, you know, as I'm 56 now I am an experienced human being but like I wasted a lot of time not learning. If you're ready to learn from past mistakes and things that didn't end up well if you're ready to apply those things. That would mean all of my process. I would have liked to have known that I could have dealt with that fucking trauma sooner and so I can unburden myself but

Joelly Goodson Lang:

it would have changed the trajectory of the course. I mean, it all everything else serendipitous,

Unknown:

right? all worked out serendipitously, oddly, but I always say like, it was like you're given like you know, the backpack you give to a kid to go to school. It's not meant for mountaineering. It's like flimsy, but as the emotional thing we're all these little pebbles that kept throwing on the end. It's like carrying boulders in the back of that fucking backpack.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

Yeah.

Unknown:

And I remember coming into recovery, you start taking an internal look at your blaming all this and unburdening myself with these fucking hang ups I had that were, it was like palpable on much lighter. I felt

Joelly Goodson Lang:

so what do you think is the secret to your success other than you and your passion when people think about higher sobra So what do you want them to know about you? What do you want? Let's go to the brand. What do you want them to know about your brand? That it's dependable

Unknown:

that it does the right thing? If I get a case, and I can't help them, I immediately tell them I'm not your person.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

I'm sorry. So you turn people away?

Bob Marier:

Yeah. All the time. Yeah. If you're going to call me and you're going to drive your narrative on how I'm supposed to do my job, yeah. Someone that's willing to work under those conditions. I'm going to do this right. If I'm doing I had a case a little while ago, a case manager was working the case and I asked them, you need to recuse yourself from this case, you guys are not doing the job. And they did. And they got into big rhubarb with the declined me and I was like, they're charging you for services. They're not giving you and I'm not okay with that. Now, you know, a lot of people would just say, just collect your paycheck and shut your fucking mouth. No, I'm gonna tell the truth. Change is cathartic it and it's painful. Everyone has their narrative.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

Before we go here, I want to ask you, what do you want your legacy to be? That's a great question. Because I want like I I've had I got cancer this year, I have to deal with that. I've got long haul COVID problems. You were supposed to do this in December, I will say this lots of times in infection and crazy infections. And now you know, I remember there was a poem at my sister's room when I was a young kid, desert errata, which may or may be made up. But it said, Oh, I remember that one, one soul breathe easier, you will have succeeded in your life. And I kind of think that I made more than a few breathe easier. And that makes me pretty, pretty, pretty happy. Because I've been able to affect change and do that. If you're an alcoholic, and you get cleaned up and you start working on yourself, you become better emotionally available for everyone. And that makes you a better person. So my legacy will be that I've been able to help a few people along the way. That's fantastic. That makes me feel really good about it. And that is a gift that has a residual effect down the line. And maybe the relationship grew with the kid wasn't good at one point. But now it's good that kids now in med school, but yeah, absolutely. All that shit that goes, Yeah. Well, thank you for taking the time out of your crazy busy day.

Bob Marier:

It was long overdue. And like, yes,

Joelly Goodson Lang:

it was overdue. And you know what the best part is? I'm really glad that we reconnected. So, you know, again, you talk about serendipity. And everything happens for a reason. And I am really happy and hopefully whether it's going to be in Montreal, or it's going to be in Miami or next time you come out west and you can stay a little bit longer. We definitely

Bob Marier:

want to do a job and I skied for two days.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

I know I know you were so close. But I know you were crazy busy. So we'll have to have to make an effort to make it happen. Well, thank you again, Bob. If people want to learn more about you and about Hired Sobriety, Google my name Bob Marier

Unknown:

Google my name I come right up kind of obnoxious to others, like you tell people to Google your name. Yeah, cuz it's good. No. Well,

Joelly Goodson Lang:

I guess it's easy and simple, right? Yep. So Okay, awesome.

Bob Marier:

Find me on that. Oops, I

Joelly Goodson Lang:

just said awesome. Now I'm going to be very self conscious of it. But

Bob Marier:

that's probably use it accordingly.

Joelly Goodson Lang:

You're absolutely no, you're you're 100% right. And I love words. I love words. And I love language

Unknown:

limits your vocabulary using for multiple things. Okay, well,

Joelly Goodson Lang:

I have to go pick up my 14 year old son. He's wondering Where's mommy? So it was I'm gonna I'm gonna follow up with you. Awesome. Yeah, it was awesome. You're awesome. This whole day has been awesome. This conversation. No, thank you again. Okay, bye. And there you have it. I really hope you enjoy the conversation and maybe learned a few things to help you with your branding. But most of all, I really hope you had some fun. This show is a work in progress. So please make sure to rate and review on whatever platform you listen to. And if you want to learn more about the branding badass, that's me. You can find me on social media under you know it, branding benefits. Thanks again. And until next time, here's to all you badasses out there.